Hello, again

Wow, its been a hot minute since I’ve genuinely sat down and written for fun. A lot of stuff has happened recently so blogging has been sent to the back of my brain so I could focus on bettering myself and focusing on school etc. So, let me fill you in on what you’ve missed.

The last blog post i wrote was back in September, i had just started 6th form, a whole load of stuff was changing in my routine and life that just really stressed me out. I went from seeing all my friends all day every day to a couple of hours a week, Callum has gone to college so i only see him a couple of times a week while juggling new schoolwork and free time to spend wisely on course work and essays. I genuinely missed writing though, for the past 5 months i’ve been writing annotations and essays on Literary periods and i thought i had forgotten how to just write! But it’s not just my routine that changed, my interests and plans have changed too. I’ve been getting more interested in art as a career, looking into tattoo artistry or something along those lines once i get back from travelling. I think it’d be a good way to still make art for fun while earning money to live. This doesn’t mean that journalism isn’t an option but im just looking at my avenues of what i CAN do. This, however, is made difficult by my school. My school very much focuses on STEM subjects (science, technology, engineering and maths) and university which, are very much opposite to my personality. We recently had a careers fair which was very much based around STEM and university, having no creative outlets or careers represented. This means i’m having to look into my options alone, slowing down the process but i’ll work it out. School is surprisingly going well now, i had a little blip in motivation and focus meaning my grades suffered slightly but i’ve been able to pull it around and got myself my first A in English Literature which i am insanely proud of. Art and photography are going well too, we are coming to the end of our practice coursework meaning we are planning final pieces and pulling everything together before we start our 60% coursework on something completely new (i’ll make sure to show you guys what i’ve been doing, making a little art post for you). That’s pretty much all that’s happened in school, i’m about 1/3 of the way through my first year and i’m feeling pretty okay about it all so far.

Now my personal life! Physically i’ve changed quite a lot, recently i’ve been experimenting with my appearance, i bleached my fringe blonde for a while, then dyed it grey then now a dark ginger. I’ve also poked some more holes in my face with a septum piercing and more recently my lip piercing. I’m finally working out what i like and feeling more comfortable in my self which is well overdue. I’ll be honest with you, recently i’ve been struggling mentally, i fell into a deep hole which i didn’t know how to get myself out of but with A LOT of patience, i’m finally getting some help outside of school to cope with my lows. It took a lot for me to ask for help but i was overwhelmed by the support i got from my parents and some of my friends and i couldn’t be more grateful. I guess this is life, everyone has their lows and its the people around us who can really help and support you through tough times and not being okay is okay. Hopefully, soon i’ll be getting my dreadlocks installed. I know, slightly random but i’ve always loved dreads since growing up with my aunty having rainbow dreadlocks. I’m having partial dreads meaning i will have loose hair on top to make a softer look. Whenever i tell someone this they struggle to picture it but I am excited to finally get the hair i’ve dreamed of. More exciting news, i’m turning 17 this week! I can learn how to drive and that’s pretty much it… i’ve always seen turning 17 as pretty pointless but i’m excited none the less. I’m looking forward to another year of memories and experiences. The rest of this year looks busy, i’m seeing my American cousins, i’m off to Ireland for a holiday with the Spicers and going into year 13. Let’s just say i’m slightly excited.

As its half term, I have a lot of free time so maybe you’ll be hearing from me again soon. I genuinely missed this so much, its such a nice outlet to just sit down and pour out whatever is in my head, even if no one reads it, it is nice for me to just write.

 

Zoe :))

 

Busy bee!

Annnddd I’m back! Wow, I’ve been busy recently. I’ve started 6th Form, got a job, worked my first couple shifts while still juggling my personal time. Let me fill you in…

GCSE results day came out of nowhere; before I got my results I was very nervous. I wasn’t too nervous about the grades themselves, I was more worried I was going to be disappointed in myself and beat myself up about perfectly fine grades. I personally do not feel comfortable posting my grades online but I’ll tell you that I passed everything and got into the subjects I wanted at 6th Form (the bits that actually matter). Now I’m starting my first full week at 6th Form and I’m still trying to wrap my head around independent study times and new courses as well as homework and timetables etc. It feels odd being some of the oldest students in school and not wearing a uniform and being able to buy coffee and all sorts of new rules. Also, I need to get used to not having Callum at school every day and all of the people I used to hang around with. Callum is now studying engineering in college which is his passion and he loves it. This does mean we see each other less but to be honest, it gives us more to talk about when we do see each other. Luckily, I have the majority of my best friends at 6th Form so I’m not sitting alone at lunch (one of my fears). I’ve fully invested in my courses already; I’m doing art, photography and English literature and honestly, I’m loving it already. It’s really exciting to be in a class with other people who actually care about the course and will actually try. It’s motivating.

I got my first job! A little while ago I applied for a job at a local restaurant and I am very pleased to say I got the job! I’m very proud of myself and I feel proper grown-up and independent. This weekend was my first couple shifts and I love it there. My managers are so lovely, the staff are really kind and help me so much as I’m still learning and we all have a laugh. I seem to be picking up how everything works quite quickly and I’m really comfortable there. At the moment I am a runner meaning I clean tables, take food out, clear up, sort out bills and I’ve started taking a couple of small orders. Hopefully, once I’m more confident and I’ve been working there for longer I’ll be trained up as a waitress so I’ll be in charge of my own tables and taking orders which sounds exciting and stressful but I think I could handle it.

Everything aside from school and work has also been amazing. Callum and I did indoor skydiving together which was super fun, I’ve been to a local festival and saw the Zutons play live (they originally wrote and sang Valerie before Amy Winehouse did a cover of it), I’ve been to Countryfile live with my family, hung out with my favourite people and had the best summer ever. So so so many memories and jokes made that I won’t ever forget.

Scotland.. So far

This week we embarked on an adventure to Edinburgh to meet our American cousins for a little holiday! Lemme get you updated!

The travel up to Edinburgh could’ve been a lot worse; the train from Milton Keynes to Manchester was great, we all got seats together and nibbled on fruit salad and crisps for 1 hour and a half. Manchester station was big and busy but we managed to grab lunch before heading to platform 14 for our longest train ride – just over 3 hours. It was chaos. There physically was not enough room on the train for the number of people that were trying to get on. Luckily the little ones got a seat for half of the journey while my mum, dad and I stood up in the aisles, stuffed like sardines in a tin. However, it still could’ve been a lot worse. As we arrived in Edinburgh, we weaved through the hustle and bustle of Princes street to find our very swanky air BnB. I must say, the 5 flights of stairs are a killer but the charm of our apartment well and truly makes up for it. We settled down for dinner at the perch which was a great first-night-find before some well-earned rest.

The second day we had a lazy morning (a common theme so far) and mooched around the surrounding streets of Princes street, Oldtown, George’s street and many more that I can’t remember (it all blurred into one). As it was Sunday, we had to find somewhere to have Sunday lunch; we settled for ‘the Cumberland’ which was a proper pub: dimly lit, the smell of hops as you walk in. The Sunday lunch looked amazing and everyone certainly enjoyed it after a day of walking.

Yet another lazy morning followed, but this was no ordinary morning… It was phoebes birthday!!!! Phoebes birthday always lands in our holiday week meaning she’s had some pretty awesome birthday locations. We surprised her with birthday doughnuts and presents while serenading her with ’happy birthday’ until her cheeks were bright red with embarrassment.

She chose ’camera obscura’ as the day’s activity. For those who don’t know, camera Obscura is a science/funhouse optical illusion house with mirror mazes, massive kaleidoscopes, mind-numbing art and holograms in every room. This was followed by a trek back from the old town to the new town for phoebes favourite dinner- Wagamama’s. I’ve never known a 7-year-old to ask to go to a Korean/Asian restaurant for their birthday and order yakisoba rather than chicken nuggets (she is one special girl). This was followed by a slightly melted caterpillar cake and the unwrapping of multiple LOL dolls before bed.

Prom!

Honestly, this was the best night of my life. I woke up the morning of the 3rd July, I was on the prom committee so, I went to Jurys inn to help set up. Straight on a bus at 8:30, grabbed a cheeky Starbucks and then I was there. We set up ribbons and the table decorations for almost three hours and we all were a little sweaty! Throughout the day, my excitement levels were rising. After sweating for three hours, I still had a couple of things to do before prom: get earrings, get eyebrows waxed, get hair clips etc. Manic. I grabbed one more cheeky Starbucks before grabbing the bus to Callums to drop off his pair of our matching shoelaces (I know, sickeningly cute). I then walked home, somehow remembered how to do makeup, first try perfect eyeliner- I was really proud of myself – and my mum curled my hair. I don’t think I have ever swallowed so much hairspray in my life.

It was showtime! I put on my GORGEOUS dress, my vans and went to Callum’s house. He looked so good in his little suit! Photos were taken while trying to stop puppy Ollie from munching on my dress and shoelaces! We then met my girlies at Brooklands for Prosecco, photos and snacks. It was a lovely photo spot apart from we got slightly blinded by the setting sun. Everyone hopped into my mum’s car, we screamed bohemian rhapsody and buttercup the whole way there (poor Callum) to the point where our voices were already waining by the time we’d got there. Everything went perfectly. When we arrived, we found the table, saw how gorgeous everyone was looking, took more ohotos , ate some food and began dancing. Dancing “isn’t callums thing” so I danced with the girls, we got sooo sweaty! Somehow we were surrounded by about 200 other students on a very small dance floor! We danced for 3 hours straight andddd, Saoirse convinced Callum to come dancing. I’ve never laughed and bounced so much in my life. I had completely lost my voice by the end of the night which just shows how much fun we were having. Everyone looked slightly dishevelled and exhausted by the end of it. Mia’s parents very kindly said we could have an after-party at hers which meant drinks and pizza! On the way home, we picked Ella up as she didn’t come to prom, Samra grabbed some clothes to put on and told my mum all about the night (I don’t think she really cared but she listened anyway!) We ordered pizza at about midnight, drank cava and Prosecco (very civilised), played truths and just talked all night. I fell asleep on the sofa at around 3 am and Callum and I walked back to his at about 6 am. It is a night I will never ever forget. It was so amazing because I had amazing company, I love my friends more than anything.

Ireland

Recently, I went on a trip to Ireland to meet and spend time with Callum’s Irish family. We went as a time to relax and chill out after the stress of exams and the added stress of waiting for our results. We flew out of Luton (I’d never been to Luton airport, it’s very nice) into Knock in Ireland. Grandad Rob lives in the Irish Mountains in a little cottage far from the busy bustling cities and towns. His house is surrounded by green fields, sheep and the occasional hare. On the first day, we visited Daniels house in Ballina. We sat for hours talking, everyone was having a catch-up before we ordered pizza and got into a heated discussion about vegetarianism and global climate change- you know, your usual conversation.

On the second day, Aiofe and AJ came over to grandad Robs and stayed over. They’re adorable. Aiofe drew both me and Callum a drawing to remember her by. I spent most of the holiday reading and sleeping- just what I needed. I read “ruby wax- how to be human” which is a book about mindfulness and health from the viewpoint of a monk, a neuroscientist and a regular person. Its really interesting, I would definitely recommend it as a more educational read rather than the fictional stories I’m used to.

We visited costa a lot, it became our meeting place so all of the visits kind of just blur into one! We met Gavin and his wife there twice and one time we met everyone there: Daniel, his little girl Emma (my new best friend), Gavin and his wife, grandad rob and Jackie as well as Sam, Tammy and of course, Callum and I. Grandad Rob made us a BBQ lunch, although the burgers Tammy and I had were slightly crispy and the meat burgers shrunk to a quarter of the size of the bun, it was very nice. He made the BEST potatoes ever (fulfilling a stereotype there) which were cheesy and so fluffy and ugh, I bet I can never make them as he did.

I really enjoyed my time in Ireland, I felt so welcome and just a part of the family. I miss them loads already and I really hope I can go again soon. Thank you Tammy for taking me!

Zoe :))

Time to relax…

I am back! I took a little break during and before GCSEs so I could focus properly but man, so much stuff has happened! This summer, I am going to blog the heck out of my life so be prepared!

Lemme give you the download on GCSEs. I didn’t feel like they were actually happening, it really felt like another round of mock exams. Everyone seemed relaxed and blasé about the whole thing. The first week of exams went pretty well, I didn’t feel particularly worried about any of them really. The first exam I really panicked about was the maths exam. It was unbelievably difficult and the questions weren’t clear of what they wanted as an answer. Apart from that, I didn’t leave questions blank and vaguely remembered the past 5 years worth of information. So, overall, feeling okay which is surprising. Maybe this is because we’ve had sooo many mock exams and our whole school lives have been leading up to these exams and – to be honest- I’m slightly underwhelmed. Now I’m enjoying my extra long summer waiting for the 22nd August to roll over so I can get my results. It’s insane how quickly the past 5 years have gone in secondary school and it’s all over. I want to say thank you to everyone who has made the past 5 years amazing and full of memories; even if we don’t really talk anymore. A particular thank you to my amazing group of girlies and Callum who I absolutely adore and have been there for ALL of us during exams and through everything. I love you.

I’ve got a BUSY summer ahead. In a couple of weeks, I’m going to Ireland to meet all of Callum’s Irish family (slightly terrified), then prom is happening. A couple of weeks after that I’m off to Scotland on holiday with my American cousins then, soon enough I’ll be going to 6th form. So much has happened too, I’ve been to Tenerife, my mum has jumped out of a plane, the spicers got a new puppy and many more giggles and memories. I’m sure you’ll hear about them soon!

Speak soon,

Zoe :))